Tuesday, May 29, 2012

More Doula Thoughts

Two days before we left for our camping adventure, I attended my second birth as a doula. This birth reminded me of many birth truths- that birth is unpredictable, uncontrollable, unique, and much like a marathon, except that at the finish line there is a beautiful little human wrapped in mama's arms.

I am gaining experience with the truth that births more often than not, occur at night. Meaning that for me, I miss an entire night of sleep. I both love and hate this. The rush and excitement of going to a birth, driving while no one is on the roads, the quiet sleepiness of the hospital, and mystery of the entire event seems magnified by the dark, deep, starry sky.

But the next day is usually a blur of headaches, clingy children, and an impatient sleep-deprived mama, who floats through the day in an exhaustion-induced higher state of consciousness, reminiscing of the magic of the night before.

Having a babysitter for an hour or two has helped me collect myself, and catch a small nap to get me through. My own doula recommended having a special "after-birth" outing planned to help entertain the children. This definitely made things go smoother. Letting the littles play at the park is a lot less mentally challenging than entertaining them at home, when I'm not on top of my parenting game. Another doula says that for the next 3-4 nights she goes to bed with her children, to catch up on sleep. I have not learned to be quite that disciplined, since after bedtime is my only time to myself and catch my breath. But hopefully, that will come with experience.

My third client was induced early due to pre-eclampsia while I was on Cumberland Island, so my back-up doula was there to cover for me. I was incredibly sad to miss the birth, but happy that all was well with mother and baby.

Speaking of back-up, I am working with a really awesome doula group, called Two Bee Birth Services. You can read about the amazing doulas that I am working with, as well as my own bio. Being a doula is a wonderful blessing, yet it's also very challenging to mesh with other parts of life, like being a parent, or having another job to supplement the lucrative career of doula-ing (I kid, I kid). As a group, doulas can work together to support each-other and to back each other up as one works through the challenges that naturally come along with the job.

I do not have any births lined-up for a couple more months, and for now, I am content with a little break. Maybe I can catch up on those 16 hours of missed sleep during April and May. I know that despite the sleep-deprivation, I will jump at the next opportunity and blessing to witness the journey of a new soul earthside.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Cumberland Island: A Camping with Toddlers Adventure

We just got back late Monday night from a trip to Cumberland Island off of the coast of Georgia, which is the reason for the silence here lately. I have been planning this trip for six months, and it was our first vacation sans family: just the four of us. My brother's high school graduation coincided with the end of our vacation, so we tagged on a trip to visit family as well. Nine days was a long time to be away from home; but the children traveled very well, and seemed to enjoy the frequent change in scenery!

This was the first time that David and I have been camping, so taking a one-year-old and almost-three-year-old to an island for three days was an adventure for all of us!

We drove down to Fernandina Beach the night before we caught a ferry in St. Mary's, GA to take us over to Cumberland Island. The island was absolutely beautiful, and we loved how peaceful and remote it was. We rarely saw another person, and only shared the entire beach with two other families who were out of ear-shot. It was a completely different vacation experience than anywhere else we have been, and it was so wonderful to "unplug" in so many different ways.

As for the camping itself, the children loved it. I did not sleep at all in the tent, but since David and the children did, it was survivable. Our second day on the island, it started to rain, and it did not stop. Our tent began to leak from the roof, and we were able to borrow a tarp from some camping "neighbors". However, even with the tarp, water seeped in through the bottom of the tent, leaving everything, and I mean, everything, wet. My sheets and air mattress were soaked, and I was wet, cold, and shivering the entire second night. The next morning, we did not even have clothes to wear or towels to dry off with, because all of stuff was drenched, and we had used what we had to dry off the night before. There was over an inch of water on the floor of the tent, and the weather forecast actually had a flood warning for the island.

So, we felt that we had no other choice but to leave the island a day earlier than we had planned. So we packed up all of our stuff, and took the ferry back to St. Mary's, and decided to spend our last two days (one night) in Savannah, GA (about two hours away from St. Mary's). It was so nice to be able to take a hot shower, dry off, and be inside during some afternoon thunderstorms in Savannah. We stayed right down on Bay Street, which made it incredibly easy to walk and see the town with the little ones. Our final stop was Tybee Island where we climbed to the top of the lighthouse. The views were gorgeous, and we enjoyed learning about the history of the lighthouse.

In the end, it was a fantastic trip. We learned a lot about camping, and hope for it to be a part of our lives on a regular basis. It was a much needed break to focus on spending time as a family after such a busy semester for David, before heading into a very busy summer.

And I think the photos speak for themselves:







































We are busy trying to get back into everyday life...and missing vacation already. It was nice to be away from the stress of trying to deal with the coyotes (And I cannot thank all of you enough for the support and advice. We are trying to decide on the best course of action, and all of your comments were very helpful). David has also entered full-time job hunting mode, since he will be graduating August. As usual, we are keeping things exciting.

Summer, here we come.

Monday, May 7, 2012

The Very Long Tail of Coyote Ugly.

I have struggled with writing this blog post for the last couple weeks. I've thrown titles up in the air for days; sputtered over the words to describe what we have been dealing with recently, sitting down to write, and then walking away.

Our darling cat, Sookie, disappeared back at the beginning of February. I was incredibly sad, not only for myself as I was pretty attached to her, but also for my little ones, who loved their kitty cat. I took this photo of Sookie just a bit before she disappeared:




She spent most of her time inside, but would play outside during the day a little bit, and then would wait for us at the door to let her in. I was really worried when she never came back to our porch.

A few days later, I was sitting on my sofa, when I heard the blood-curdling yips, howls, and laughs of a pack of coyotes right outside our window.

I cried and cried.

Unbeknownst to me, there is a den of coyotes uncomfortably close to our house.  When I talked to our closest neighbor, she said that she had been hearing them for nearly a year and that they wake her up at night quite frequently (our bedroom sounds like the inside of an airplane thanks to my reliance on an air filter to sleep).

When the chickens joined our family, we were pretty concerned. We were careful about locking them up securely at night, and we let them roam our yard during the day.

At this point, we learned that there are many myths about coyotes: one of them being that coyotes are nocturnal and only hunt at night.

After we had had our chickens for 6 weeks or so, I left the house for half an hour to pick up David at 3 PM in the afternoon, and came home to two less chickens in my flock. I thought that maybe they would come back and were just hiding somewhere. But when David searched the fields that surround our house, he found a trail of feathers all the way across the pasture, from our house back into the woods. Leaving only feathers would seem indicative that the coyotes took two of my hens as a mid-day snack.

We were upset and shocked that coyotes took them in the middle of the day, and we began constructing a new coop that they could stay in all day that was coyote-proof. However, David was rarely home at all, and did not have time to work on it much, so it was slow going.

The following week, I walked past my back door after I had woken up in the morning, and out the windows I saw a coyote, leaping in mid-air, with Chanticleer in his mouth, not ten feet from my porch. I grabbed my shoes and a shovel (the closest thing to a weapon that I had near me), and went running and screaming bloody murder after the coyote. Exactly what I was screaming is not appropriate it repeat, but I startled the coyote enough to drop Chanticleer. In the process, I think scared all of my neighbors within half a mile of us, too.

David's sister and her boyfriend just happened to be visiting, for what will probably be the last time ever, after that brouhaha. (Just kidding, I hope!) They, and David, who hadn't really seen what was happening in the yard, came running outside too.

We saw another coyote standing in our brush, watching us, after I had chased off the first coyote. And there were two other chickens who were already missing. One came back, missing feathers, but alive. However the other never returned. We went from a flock of seven to four in the matter of a week.

After this crazy, adrenaline-filled, and night-mare giving morning, things we pretty quiet for a little while. I was constantly looking over my shoulder, and was too anxious to be at home with the kids by myself. Spending most of my time at the park, library, park, another park, or walking around stores/running errands.

My chickens stopped roosting in their coop, even though they had roosted in there every night for the past two months. I'm assuming because they were afraid/ sensed predators. They took up to roosting right by our door, and I thought that perhaps with the motion sensor-ed light and the close proximity to us and Pongo, that it might be the safest place for them.

One morning, about two weeks ago, David woke up around 6:30 AM, and when I got up around 7:30 AM, David said realized that he hadn't heard Chanticleer crow that morning. David searched and searched, but no sign of him.

I took David to class, and then, when I was driving home, I noticed in front of our house (on the outside of our picket fence), orange feathers, everywhere. When David came home, he surveyed the area, and it seemed rather clear that coyotes had chased our poor rooster off of our porch, out of our yard into the front of our fence and gotten him.While I cared about all of my chickens, I was especially attached to Chanticleer. He was my first chicken, and such a sweet rooster. I loved hearing him crow every time he saw us in the morning. And he made me laugh every day.

I was heart-broken. After several weeks of my flock being preyed-upon, I felt like such a failure. I couldn't bare the thought of losing another chicken, or even worse, that my children might be outside when coyotes come into our yard. So, we gave our three remaining chickens to some friends of ours, where we knew they would be safe and cared for. Even though our new coop would most likely keep them safe, the safety of my family was more of a concern- and I did not want to have anything that would encourage the coyotes to come near us.

The week following re-homing our chickens, we spotted coyotes four different days in our yard- at all times of the day. Pongo actually chased two of them out of our yard. While it's nice to know that he is protective of our home, and surprisingly fierce when threatened, it's a little disconcerting for there to be a coyote hiding in the bushes about ten feet from your car when you pull in the driveway, and to not even know it.

All in all, it's been a stressful time. I've learned more about coyotes than I ever wanted to know.

Things I had heard about coyotes that just aren't true:

-Coyotes are nocturnal and hunt at night.  And at 6 AM, 9 AM, 12 PM, and 3 PM if they are hungry.
-Coyotes are scared of humans. Except that they will come within a few feet of humans, show no sign of fear, and are not afraid of cars, homes, and the presence of dogs.
-Coyotes are afraid of light, loud music, dogs, etc. While this might be true of more rural coyotes, urban coyotes are desensitized to all of the things.
-Coyotes are small, and look somewhat like foxes. These are actually bigger than Pongo, and look more like a wolf to me.

It's been a long past few weeks. I can't let the children play outside, and honestly, I'm afraid to be outside myself. It's been a challenge to handle the energy of level of an almost-three-year-old and a one-year-old who are quite the adventurous spirits and would live outside if I let them. And I have had a lot of anxiety and depression about the entire situation.

At this point, we are not completely sure what to do about it. We don't have the money to put in a fence (it would be around $4k to fence our yard), and trapping is also pricey and uncertain. It's illegal to shoot a gun in city limits (did I mention that all of this is taking place in a rather residential area?!). Not to mention, a challenge when dealing with a moderate to large pack of coyotes.

A large part of me just wants to move. I am so tired of the stress that this has brought on me and my family. But obviously, that's not simple either.

So for now, we are coping. And spending a lot of time at the park. And feeling depressed about homestead dreams that seem even further out of reach. And just unsure.


Edit: A couple of you mentioned calling animal control, and believe me, we have! They cannot do anything with coyotes, primarily because they do not have the equipment necessary. We, and our neighbors, have talked to them multiple times, and depending on who we talk to, they range from completely unhelpful, to suggesting that we use a certified trapper.

Friday, May 4, 2012

This Week: May 4th

I am in the process of writing a long post updating the last few crazy weeks, but until then, some photo love from this week:



puppy love, all around.


Damon, so proud of climbing up to the table to discover his favorite drink: kombucha. (He drank it all himself.)

Happy weekend!

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Meet Pongo.

Meet Pongo...our newest addition.

He was an April Fool's puppy, and I guess you could say the joke was on us. David and I (and our littles, of course) were going to get a cup of coffee at our local coffee shop, chat, and enjoy a little break on a Sunday afternoon. When we saw the parking lot, which would usually be quite empty on a Sunday afternoon, it was completely full of cars, and tents, and, oh my, dogs.

All of the local humane societies were having adoption day in the very parking lot of our coffee shop, where we were going to get a cup of coffee.

Now, so that we do not sound unbelievably rash, David and I have been looking for the perfect dog for our family for quite some time now. We've met several dogs from different rescue groups, and I browse Petfinder on a regular basis. But we haven't been in a hurry, because we really wanted it to be the right fit.

So back to the parking lot- I convinced David to "just look" at the dogs and let Dmitri see them. We walked quickly and un-interestedly past several cages, and until we reached a beautiful dog who was calmly laying in his crate while the other dogs went bizerk beside him. All of us were instantly drawn to him, and we sat and looked at him, and he looked at us. And I said at least seven times, he is so cute, and calm, and sweet.

So we got him out. He stood calmly beside us, and was happy to be petted. And Dmitri and Damon petted him, and hugged him, and laughed at him. All four of us were quite smitten.

We took an adoption application, and went to get that cup of coffee.

And really, there is very little left to the story, except that we left the coffee shop with an iced black & white mocha, and a black and white puppy too.

He remained nameless for a day or two, until we settled on Pongo. 101 Dalmations was both David's and my favorite childhood movie, and so it stuck. I wanted to wait a little to write about him, so that I actually had something to write about. He's quite well-behaved; he sits, stays, comes, and leaves the chickens alone, thankfully. He is great with other dogs, and the kids love him. And he goes into his crate on command and is potty trained.

We are still working with him, and he still has some puppy habits- like surfing the table for food and I have to watch him with the littles' wooden toys.

But he has brought a lot of happiness, and Dmitri and Damon really enjoy having a furry creature to love on.

Without further ado, here is Mr. Pongo.